


Boys/Boys/Girls

by Parvmore



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: AU, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, F/M, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-29
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:27:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22013332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Parvmore/pseuds/Parvmore
Summary: When you’ve spent most of your life trying to fit the image you’ve been made out to be you tend to forget who you are. But maybe Mickey can get away from his past and show people who he really is. With the help of those around him he’ll get to where  he’s suppose to.
Relationships: Ian Gallagher & Mandy Milkovich, Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich, Mandy Milkovich & Mickey Milkovich
Comments: 5
Kudos: 12





	1. Mickey Milkovich

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time doing anything like this so bear with me if it seems really bad at first, I’ll get better lol. I started this just for fun and I have a general idea of where I see this going and I hope someone actually enjoys what I have to write. And if all things go well there will be a second part to this... but first let’s get through this first one.

Mickey hasn’t exactly been doing the best in school. In all honesty it wasn’t because he didn’t understand his work, but merely because he had a reputation to uphold. He was, after all, the toughest badass fag beater this side of the Chicago River. 

Yea, maybe it’s not the best reputation to keep up but it kept assholes from fucking with him. 

Besides if anyone knew the actual Mickey Milkovich they would be pretty surprised... not that anyone has tried.

It’s not like he hasn’t tried to make friends or at least acquaintances. It’s just when he does attempt to they think he’s gonna shake them down or beat them up. 

Mickey hasn’t minded being alone all that much though, he’s kind of learned to enjoy the solitude. But when he’s feeling his loneliest there is always at least a Milkovich sibling present to keep him company. 

Him and Mandy have always been the closest of the Milkovich siblings, seeing as they're in the same grade due to Mickey flunking 9th grade. They always had each other’s backs and were there to help one another when they needed it.

Though Mickey didn’t get along with practically anyone, there was one teacher that he liked almost as much as he feared her. Mickey feared very little things, and Mrs. Barceras was one of them. She was a young woman, maybe in her 20’s, who seemed to love her students. Well, most of them anyways. She didn’t despise Mickey like most of his teachers. She was very caring which threw him off because well he’s never really had that, especially from his teachers. She always let him off easier than he probably should’ve been. And on the last day of his junior year he asked her why. 

“So,” he said as he walked up to her desk. “Yes Mr. Milkovich?” Mrs. Barceras said, not looking up from her grading. Mickey shuffled a bit and decided he should just get straight to the point. 

“Why have you been so forgiving with me? You trying to get a best teacher award or something?” 

Now she looked up at him, slightly amused. “No, Mikhailo. I know that though you may try to act tough, you’re actually just as nice as all the other kids.” She says as she takes out a sticky note. Now it’s Mickey’s turn to be amused. 

“When did you become such a fuckin comedian?” He asked. 

“It’s not a joke Mickey. I truly believe that you are a good student. I don’t particularly enjoy your disruptions or outbursts but I do know that you’re just keeping up an act. It’s actually pretty easy to notice with you” she says scribbling the time, his name, and the date as the bell rang. 

“And what act would that be exactly?” He questioned chuckling to himself.

“You’re trying to make someone proud of you, possibly a father or maybe even a friend.” She says now staring into his eyes. The eye contact causes Mickey to feel a little flustered and he breaks it by looking at the blackboard behind her. 

“I’m not judging you Mr. Milkovich, I know people who have gone through the same things.” She then hands him the sticky note excusing him from his tardiness. “You’re a good kid at heart, you’re just letting the people in your life control your actions.” 

“I thought you were a Spanish teacher not a psychologist.” He says as he fiddles with the sticky note. 

“Well I did take a psychology course in college so who’s to say?.” She says smiling at him. “Now get to your 5th period. I’ll see you in here next year for Spanish 4, that is if you’re taking the class.” 

“Yeah, yeah. Kinda have to to graduate.” Not necessarily true since he did his two years of a foreign language already but Mrs Barceras just waves him off. He goes to grab the handle of the door when it bursts open knocking him over.

“What the fuck!” He yells as he tends to his reddened forehead. He looks up to see it’s actually Mandy who knocked him on his ass. 

“Oh shit sorry Mick! Are you okay?” Mandy asks staring at his hunched over form. Mrs. Barceras only slightly looked over to him, then continued to grade.

“Yea but fuck Mandy watch where you’re fucking going, Jesus!” He says taking Mandy’s hand and getting up. “Why the fuck you in such a rush to get here anyways?” 

“I forgot to turn in my final so I came to drop it off. Why are you here? Are you hassling our amazing teacher here?” Mandy asked teasingly. 

“Actually, I was just having a civil fucking conversation until you busted my skull.” He said as he continued to rub his forehead. 

“Hey Mrs. B, you think I should go to the nurse or?” He asked as he began to head to the door, more cautiously this go around. 

“Well if you don’t have a mild concussion I would say get to class.” 

“Fucking feels like a mild concussion” he huffed under his breath. “Hey Mandy.” He called her and then flipped her off. He looked at the note in his hand and was glad he wouldn’t be reprimanded for his tardiness like every other day. 

When he got into class he handed the note to his teacher and sat in his seat in the middle isle. Like all his previous classes, they weren’t doing much. After all it was the last day of the school year, there wasn’t much to do. They watched a movie on one of the world wars probably like the third one or some shit. Mickey was too busy sleeping to know what was even going on. 

After sixth, he goes to meet Mandy in their spot in front of the school. He sees Mandy has attracted a crowd and begins to walk up to them. He hears them talking about their plans for the summer and how they’ll all meet up at some point. Mickey isn’t very intrigued. 

He moves to the side waiting for Mandy to finish her conversation, deciding it would be the perfect time for a smoke. 

As he’s about to light it though he sees Mandy already walking ahead of him with one of her friends. He lights his cigarette and runs up to catch up to them. 

Neither Mandy or the boy next to her mind him as he walks up with them. He looks over to see a tall red headed boy having a conversation with Mandy about science or some shit. He knows he’s seen that face before but he can’t quite put his finger on it. 

_ What’s the last name? Something with a G... Gallahan? No that’s not it. Garcia! Hm no that doesn’t sound right.  _

Then it hits him. 

“I don’t think iron deficiency is the prob-“ 

“Gallagher! Ian Gallagher right?” Mickey says interrupting Mandy’s conversation with Ian. “Yea?” Ian questions more than states. 

“No nothing I just couldn’t remember your name.” Ian then continues his conversation with Mandy about her excess tiredness during school. 

***

When they arrive home, Ian leaves waving to Mandy saying he’ll see her later that day. Mickey’s ears perk up to that and he’s not exactly sure why. 

“What did he mean you’re gonna see him later?” Mickey asked as nonchalantly as he could manage. 

“We’re going to Sarah’s party, her parents are out of town and she decided to seize the opportunity.” She said as she unlocked the door. 

“I thought you didn’t like that bitch? Didn’t she like steal your friends or whatever it was?” He asked plainly. 

“Well obviously I’m not going for her, I’m going for the guys that’ll be there. Don’t worry I’ll have Ian with me for protection.” She said pushing his shoulder slightly. 

“Why didn’t you ask me to go with you? You know I would’ve.” He said as he turned on his PlayStation in the living room. 

“Well I thought you’d be pretty busy with your own stuff. See! Like playing games which you do all the time.” She said pointing at his figure laying on the couch. “But do you want to come along? Since you’re clearly upset I didn’t invite you.” She teases.

“I’ll let you know.” With that, he went on to playing his games and thinking of what he would wear later that night. 

***

He decided on wearing just a regular black shirt, baggy jeans, and a dark blue sweater. It wasn’t like he needed to dress nice or anything. He did take forever deciding whether or not cologne should be added into the picture, which in the end he decided might be the right choice. 

As he stepped out of the restroom Mandy whistled at him. Mickey just walked past her and headed out the door. 

“Wow! Mickey Milkovich wearing cologne? Who’s going to the party that you decided to bust that out for?” She teases him as they walk to where Ian lives. 

“No one, I just didn’t want to smell gross. Is that a problem?” He questions her, almost irritated. 

“No, no, I’m glad you did. You were starting to have a musk around you.” She said grinning widely. 

“No the fuck I didn’t!” He said clearly not recognizing the humor behind her words. 

“Jesus Mickey I’m just messing around with you. For a Milkovich you’re pretty clean.” She says as they turn the street to the Gallagher residence. 

He thought for awhile then spoke. “You know you’re a Milkovich too right? So, you’re saying you’re dirty?” He said smirking a little as she climbed the stairs. 

“Okay well we’re the exceptions to the Milkovich musk. Anyways, I was mainly talking about Iggy.” They both start laughing a little and then the door opens. 

A brunette woman appears and smiles warmly at them. “Hey Fiona.” Mandy addressed her. 

“Hey kiddo, come inside. I think Ian’s almost ready.” Her and Mickey make there way inside and sit on the couch as they wait for Ian. 

“So you’re Mickey Milkovich, huh? Mandy has talked a lot about you, the infamous Milkovich Brother.” Fiona says leaning on the kitchen doorframe, smiling. 

“Oh yea? What is it that Mandy’s been spouting off about me?” He questions looking over at a grinning Mandy. 

“Well nothing bad. She’s just told us about her amazing brother with the really bad rep and a heart of gold.” Mickey looks a bit confused but Mandy just smiles at him. 

“I mean it’s true Mick, you’re a great brother. People just make you out to seem as if you’re actually a bad person.” Nudging her shoulder into his. 

“Yea, sure. Whatever you say.” He said looking off towards the the stairs.

“So what are the big plans for tonight?” Fiona asks. 

“Nothing much were just gonna...” Mickey tunes out with his sudden interest in hearing a familiar voice yell upstairs. “...but that’s probably about it.” Fiona nods at whatever Mandy has just told her about their plans. 

“Hey, can I use your restroom? Need to piss.” He asks Fiona.

“Yea, of course. You’re gonna have to use the one upstairs though cause the one down here needs to get fixed.” She tells him as he stands up. 

“That’s fine.” After all that is where he wanted to anyway. 

“It’s gonna be the second to last door at the end of the hall.” 

With that he walks up the stairs and sees Ian as well as another boy there with him. “Jesus Lip, just wear another fucking shirt!” Ian yells at him as he rummages through one of his drawers. 

“Dude c’mon I was gonna use that one. I had my pants and shit for that shirt, please?” Lip pleaded. 

“Fucking fine.” Ian takes off the button up and hands it over to Lip, only then noticing Mickey’s presence. 

Mickey could see his chiseled figure and realized he was staring. “Uh, Fiona said I could use the restroom?” He said almost questioning himself. 

“It’s the door to your left.” Ian says smiling slightly at him.

He pissed, washed his hands, and then stood looking into the mirror. He noticed a strand of his hair was out of place and began to fix it, realizing he wanted to look nice. He had a feeling he knew why but he didn’t want to go down that road right now. Though that Gallagher kid sure did have his mind spinning a bit, so maybe he could think about it a little bit. 

_Was he even gay? Maybe bi? Well he hasn’t really thought about girls in any sort of sexual way. And his imagination was running wild with thoughts about Ian and his body. So yea, definitely gay._

But he couldn’t be, for obvious reasons. He would just have to keep it all bottled up inside, ya know like any gay kid in the south side would have to. Who knows maybe when he graduates and leaves this shit city he can actually be with someone. Well, probably not, Mickey had a lot of doubts about that. But who knows...

The cracking open of the bathroom door pulls him out of his reverie and he sees Mandy and Ian at the door.

“What the hell is taking you so long, Jesus? I was yelling your name for like five minutes! We thought your short ass fell into the toilet!” She said grinning at his frown. 

“Fuck you. I’m not fucking short.” He says as he pushes past both of them. 

“Sure you aren’t.” She snickered. “Anyways let’s get going before it gets too late and ginger over here turns into a pumpkin.” Mandy says nudging Ian as they walk down the stairs. Mickey notices the exchange and can’t help but feel a twinge or jealousy. Hell, he hadn’t even known Ian for longer than a couple hours and he was already getting upset. 

_ This is gonna be a long night. _ He thought to himself while staring at Mandy and Ian laughing. Ian must’ve caught on to his staring and took it as confusion.

“Fiona wants me to be home by 12. She wants to go out somewhere tomorrow morning with Debbie so l have to take care of the Liam and Carl.” Ian says to him.

“Who the fuck are they?” 

“They’re Ian’s younger brothers.” Mandy replies to Mickey’s comment. 

“Oh.” 

They walked out the door and headed towards Sarah’s house only a few blocks over. “So, Ian have you been with that one girl still?” Mandy asked wiggling her eyebrows a little. Mickey immediately turned his attention to the redhead, awaiting his response. 

“Well you know, I only see her at the Kash and Grab so... It’s not really a thing anyways.” Ian stayed plainly. 

_ Her? _ Mickey thought to himself. Of course he would be the one to be attracted to a straight guy. It’s not as if he was planning on making any moves on him, he just wanted to fantasize about it. 

_ At least he said it’s not a thing? Fuck, why should I even care. _ Scowling at nothing as they continued their walk.

Mandy took notice, knowing something was wrong with him. “You good Mick?” She asked as they approached the house, lights strobing through the windows. 

“Yea, whatever let’s go in and get a drink.”He said as he hastily opened the door to the loud music

_ Yup, a really long fucking night.  _


	2. Eyelids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A party, a hero, memories, and a series of (un)fortunate events.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO IM A LIAR LMAOOO   
> I’m sorry this took so long, I said I’d have it up really soon and it has now been a week or two. Life caught up to me a bit and I barely finished it lol  
> It is 1:00 am and I stayed up to make sure I had it done   
> Sorry again but here you guys go

As soon as they were inside Mickey made a B-line for the kitchen. That’s where he hoped all the alcohol would be just so he could get buzzed and not deal with whatever the fuck it was that he was feeling. 

Upon reaching his destination he couldn’t help but notice that Mandy had been trailing behind him sans Ian. If the kid was suppose to be there to make sure no assholes messed with her, where had he gone? 

Almost as if reading his mind Mandy told him “Ian had to go talk to Sarah so she knew we were here.” she shrugged. 

“Good for him.” Mickey stated plainly.

Sometimes Mickey swore the Mandy could actually read his mind. Who knows? Maybe her goth phase wasn’t actually a phase and she was actually some sort of telekinetic superhero... or maybe Mickey had been watching too many Marvel movies. Either way he just shrugged and went back on his quest for beer. 

He opened the cooler that had been laid to the side of the back entrance where more people had been dancing. To his surprise the cooler only had sodas inside. He rummaged around until his hand was freezing cold to no avail. Mandy stood above him smirking. 

“Ya know, the one with all the actual good stuff is outside right?” She poked around his side with her foot. 

“No, yea I definitely knew that. Just wanted to give myself fuckin frostbite.” He glared at her as he began to get up. “Why the hell they even separate the drinks?” He asked following Mandy out the back door, putting his hand inside his sweater to thaw it out. The cold water seeped through his shirt causing him to shiver and curse to himself. 

“I don’t know Mick, it’s not my party but I’ve been to many of her parties before and asked myself the same thing.” She said leading him to the bigger cooler that had been placed near the fence separating the houses. 

She bent down to get them each of them a beer. One dude of to the side whistled at her and she smiled up at them. Though Mickey was having none of that and had the guy pinned up against the wall threatening his life before Mandy could even comprehend what was happening. Mickey has his freezing hand pulled back in a fist.

“You really think it’s cool to catcall a girl bending over? Huh? Especially when her brother is with her and can kick your ass?” Mickey asked the guy in a calm dark tone. The guy was sputtering an excuse with fear in his eyes as Mandy approached Mickey. 

“C’mon Mick, we’re at a party leave him alone.” Mandy said with a hand on his shoulder. “You’re drawing a crowd to yourself.” She whispered as he looked around. People had begun to stare and Mickey wasn’t really the type to be the center of attention. He released the guy and told him to fuck off. What a fucking wuss. 

“Fuck you looking at?” Mickey scowled at no one in particular. Everyone went back to their conversations and left Mickey and Mandy leaned up against the fence. Mandy handed him an open beer, beaming at him.

“What you smiling for?” Mickey asked trying to sound indifferent. He actually quite liked it when Mandy smiled, it didn’t happen often and he was glad when she would. God knows they didn’t smile much growing up in the Milkovich House of Horrors. 

“Just rarely get to see the caring side. You starting to go soft?” She teased. 

“Fuck off, you want shit like that to happening to you?” She shook her head. “Exactly, so I’ll keep assholes who don’t deserve you away.” Mickey stated trying again to not show too much emotion. 

“My hero.” She said as she clinked their beers together. “Almost like Prince Charming.” Mandy laughed. After taking a big swig of her beer she looked over at Mickey. “I’m gonna go look for Ian, try to enjoy yourself yea?” She placed a hand on his shoulder and looked into his eyes. 

“Yea, yea alright. Go find your redhead.” He grunted wishing she had invited him along to look for him. Not that he wanted to see the kid, just he didn’t want to be alone... 

“I’ll find you later, k? Also you might wanna pay attention more, those girls over there have been staring at you for awhile.” She winked at him and began to mix into the crowd. 

He hadn’t noticed them until Mandy had pointed them out. It was a group of three girls, one blonde and the other two had very light brown hair. From what he could tell they were sort of just eyeing him. He began to feel awkward and just raised his beer at them, instantly regretting it as one of the brunette girls began to walk up to him. He braced for impact and tried to come up with any and all excuses he could use to get out of the oncoming conversation. 

“Heyyy, I saw how you defended that other girls honor and I wanted to say how thankful I am you stepped in.” She said smiling brightly at him. 

“Oh, um yea... you’re welcome?” He was taken aback, usually girls would just try to get in his pants rather than thank him for something. 

“Sorry I’m not trying to be weird or anything but it’s just nice to see someone stick up for others. There aren’t really many good guys in the south side ya know. I’m Jessica by the way.” She put her hand out for Mickey to shake it. 

“Mickey.” He said shaking it. “So, uh, that the only reason you came up to me?” 

“No, I also wanted to say you’re pretty handsome.” She smirked at him. 

And there it was

He was about to come up with something to let her down gently when she put a hand on his shoulder. He looked up and saw that she was just smiling at him again. 

“Uhhhh well umm...” 

“Relax I’m not trying to get into your pants. I actually did just want to tell you thanks for what you did.” She was grinning even wider now, probably due to his nervousness. “I’ll tell you a secret, the blonde over there is my girlfriend.” She said pointing at her. The blonde girl waved at them and they both waved back. 

“Oh, thank Christ, girls aren’t exactly-“ he cut himself off realizing what he was saying, his eyes wide. Damn why the hell was he running his mouth he didn’t even know this chick. She just looked at him and squeezed his shoulder. 

“Anyways, you seem like a great person and I’m glad there are people like you out there.” She lifted her hand from his shoulder, looking back at her posse. If you could even call them that. “Well I should get back to them, sorry if I came off as weird or anything.”

“Uh no don’t worry about it. It’s cool.” He was still kicking himself for basically outing himself. Almost 

“Bye Mickey.” She waved back as she made her way to the other two girls. Mickey just nodded, hoping she didn’t actually catch on to what he had almost said. He couldn’t have word spreading that Mickey Milkovich was a big ol homo. Hell, he was still trying keep his thoughts about a particular ginger out of his head. 

He thought about all the times he’d seen his dad and brothers beat up a gay couple minding their business in the street. If he could he’d make sure he was the one doing the bashing, not cause he enjoyed it but because he went easier on them than the others would. He had never beat anyone hard enough to hospitalize them, that got him some shit from Terry but he’d be more than happy to take the hits so someone else wouldn’t have to. He’s always been like that he guessed. Selfless and willing to help others in any way he could, even if it didn’t seem like he was helping. He bet that was the part of him that wasn’t linked to Terry. 

He thought about his mother often but tried not to torture himself with the memory of her. She was always the light in the darkness that was his life. She kept them out of trouble and made sure he, Mandy, and Iggy would learn to be better than their asshole of a father. Always telling them to look at the bright side of things, the light at the end of the tunnel. To this day Mickey was still skeptical about that. 

***

“Mikhailo, leave your sister alone! You know better, please.” His mother, Laura, said trying to separate Mickey’s hand from Mandy’s hair without causing Mandy any more pain. 

“She started it and I’m just finishing it.” Mickey said still holding on tightly as Laura swatted his hand with her own. Mandy had tears pricking in her eyes but kept them at bay. Technically Mickey had started it by taking half of Mandy’s Hershey bar. When she found out about it she stormed into the room they shared and punched his shoulder. Then Mickey grabbed for her hair, eliciting a yell from Mandy. They had been fighting and struggling for what seemed like minutes when Laura found them where they were now. 

Finally separating the two, Laura decided to grab both of them and put them in her lap. They were both pouting and giving each other the signature Milkovich scowl. Even at the ripe old age of 9 and 8 years old they had perfected it. 

“What’s going on with you two? Why are you guys fighting?” Laura asked, the concern showing her tone. Mickey simply huffed and looked away from Mandy. Mandy did the same, coping Mickey’s exact posture. She tended to do that a lot, coping Mickey’s mannerisms and style. She loved her brother and wanted to be just like him, even though he was mean to her sometimes. 

“I swear you guys act like you’re married rather than related.” She knew that would get a rise out of the siblings. 

“Ewww, I’d rather marry a boy than have to deal with her.” Mickey groaned as Mandy just shot daggers at him. Laura’s breath hitched a little at the statement. She didn’t even want to think about what Terry would do if he heard his son say anything like that. 

Mickey looked up at his moms worried expression, and assumed it was cause he had hurt Mandy’s feelings. Though he was usually the one to start fights with his little sister he was also the one who would apologize first. Mickey’s voice snapped her out of her thoughts. 

“I’m sorry that I- wait, what did I even do?” Mickey questioned thinking about what he had done in the first place to deserve a punch. 

“You ate the rest of my chocolate bar without asking!” Mandy hissed at him. 

Oh yea I did do that. He thought to himself. 

“Okay well I’m sorry I ate your chocolate without asking you.” He declared. Mandy seemed to simmer down and then just looked down at where her mother was holding her by her stomach. 

“Okay, apology accepted.” She mumbled. Mickey knew she was still upset, which in turn was now making him sad. 

“I’ll give you my candy next time we go to the store.” He promised hoping that’d be enough to get himself off the hook. He knew it worked when she looked back up at him with a half smile on her lips. 

“You promise?” Mandy asked, still trying to hide her smile. 

“Yes, I promise Mandy.” 

And with that Laura brought them into a big group hug I’m her lap, kissing each of them on the tops of their heads. “Now how hard was that huh? Sometimes you gotta communicate how you feel so that others can understand you.” They giggled as she began to tickle both of them. “I’ll try to get us to the store later today, alright?” They both nodded and Mandy was excited for the extra treat she was going to get. 

When they got to the store they got their treats and walked home. Mandy reached in the bag and found that there was a Hershey bar and a Snickers bar in the bag. She distinctly remembered asking Mickey for a Hershey’s bar and she looked upset, yet again. 

“Mickeyyyy, you didn’t get a Hershey’s. You know I don’t like them, you got for yourself.” She pouted. 

“Well I think they’re good so you should try it. Have you even tried one before?” Mickey asked. She shook her head. He really didn’t pick the Snickers bar to spite Mandy he just really enjoyed them, the caramel, the almonds, who doesn’t like Snickers?

“Mandy, it’s fine, look on the bright side now you get to try something new! Don’t you like new things?” Laura eyed Mandy. That was the first time Laura had said something like that to them, over something so trivial as a candy bar. Mandy nodded to her mother and they continued on their way home. Mandy had in fact ended up liking the Snickers bar. Mickey knew she would but was a little upset he didn’t get anything. 

Later that day, his mother had sat with him on the couch watching Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the live-action one which honestly scared Mickey shitless not that he’d ever admit it. Laura nudged him and he looked up at her. She had a small smile playing at her face and then she presented him with a Snickers bar. 

“What’s this for?” He asked as she handed it to him. 

“You’re a good brother Mikhailo, even though you try to act like a mean. I love you, мій гарний хлопчик” She squeezed him really tight that night and then went to sleep. He ate his candy and thought of all that had happened that day. The bright side of things, even then he wasn’t sure why you’d want to look on the bright, he didn’t want to go blind. But that little bit of optimism kept him going in his shitty life. 

***

Someone walking by bumped into him, pulling him out of his reverie. He was so wrapped up in his thoughts he hadn’t noticed he was just standing there zoning out. He must look high off his ass just standing there. No one was really looking at him or anything so he was in the clear. He made his way back inside and saw they had some fancy looking lunchable time shit on plates. Ya know with crackers and the cheese and slice of meat. He went to a plate and tried one, which in hindsight was pretty dangerous considering the environment. It didn’t taste off or anything so he went for another, and another, and another. He finally decided on taking the whole platter with him. Now he sat on the couch eating these little appetizers, watching as people made out on the further end of the couch. 

Some people really just had no respect, huh? He thought to himself. He watched as some girl sat on another guys nap and just sucked his face. Mickey’s face scrunched up as he saw the guy grab a handful of ass. He just looked back at his plate and kept eating, thinking about whether or not he should just ditch ditch Thelma and Louise. He wasn’t even hanging out with them so really what was the point of staying. Then he remembered that he was here to keep an eye on his sister, he might as well look for her. 

He began to get up from the couch when a pink haired girl fell on his lap. Maybe fell was the wrong word since she was now straddling him. 

“Woah princess, I don-“ he was cut off by the girl pressing her lips against his. He could smell and taste the alcohol she had been consuming that night. He knew he could save face by letting it happen so people could see that Mickey Milkovich was no homo, but then she tried to stick her tongue in his mouth. He grimaced and pulled her off of him. 

“Hey! What’s the deal?” She asked confused to why he stopped. 

“What’s my fuckin deal? You’re the one who just pounced on me like one a damn cougar.” 

Ah, that’s where they got the term from. He thought. 

“What don’t act like you didn’t want some of this.” She told him as she moved her hand over her body suggestively. Mickey could acknowledge her beauty but he absolutely did not want any of that. 

“Look Pink Berry, I don’t have time for whatever faze you got goin’ on and I absolutely don’t want any of... whatever the hell this is.” He walked away hearing her complain about him until he was out of earshot. He found the bathroom and locked the door behind him. He splashed water on his face and looked at himself in the mirror. He should probably just catch up with Mandy and stick with them the rest of the night. Maybe he could get to know Ian a little more. Only because he and Mandy are good friends and what kind of brother would he be if he didn’t know Mandy’s friends. He looked at his phone to check the time. 

10:02 huh? It’s still early as far as a party goes but Ian did need to be home before 12:00. He opened the door and walked out still looking at his phone. As he turned the corner he collided into someone almost dropping his phone. 

“I need to start watching where I’m going.” he mumbled to himself. “Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.” He looked up and his breath hitched. He could recognize that face anywhere. 

“Hey don’t worry about it, happens to the best of us.” Ian said smiling a little at Mickey. He was trying to memorize every feature on Ian’s face as fast as he could. “Mandy’s around the corner in case you need her.” Ian told him. Mickey nodded and Ian brushed against him as he moved past. The chills that were sent through his spine from that simple movement has him reeling. He stood there for a second as he watched Ian head into the bathroom. Mickey had to hold himself back from walking in after him, he wasn’t even into dudes to his knowledge. They were also surrounded by people and people talk, another reason he couldn’t just walk in. Though the biggest reason being he couldn’t like boys, he was too afraid of the consequences. He still felt that heat in his arm from where Ian had touched him. He knew what it meant but he would just have to forget that for now.

He turned the corner and there was Mandy on her phone with a beer in her hand. “Yo!” She said as he approached her. “How’s it going for you so far?” 

“Eh, its whatever. Not exactly having the most fun.”

“Oh really? That’s not what I heard...” she grinned at him, tilting her head towards the general location of the living room. 

“Fuck you talking about?” He knew what she was implying but wanted to figure out how she knew. If he’d seen her he would’ve used her as the excuse to get out of there. 

“Well I asked Ian to get me a coke earlier and he told me about how you and Hayley Flores were enjoying each other’s company.” She winked while budding shoulder with him. 

Mickey’s eyes grew larger than the moon in that moment. Ian has seen him and that girl together, which definitely makes him look straight. On one hand that’s a plus, if Ian thought he was enjoying himself maybe others thought so as well. Though that means that Ian thinks Mickey is straight and well he may have been hoping to score some points with the ginger. Gallagher wasn’t even gay anyways, so really nothing gained and nothing lost. Maybe this was all a good thing, now he could try to hang out with him more and no one would really question it. 

A snap brought him back to reality. 

“Mickey, hello?” Mandy said now waving her hand over his face. 

“Who the hell is that?” He was hoping that his blanking would seem more like him trying to figure out who she was talking about rather than the small crisis going on in his head. 

“Jesus Mick, you didn’t even get her name? You’re worse than Iggy!” She snickered. 

“Don’t need it. She wasn’t my type anyways.” He said simply. 

“Really??” She pretended to be shocked. “You Mickey Milkovich, have preferences on who you fuck? Wow, didn’t you like sleep with half the girls in 8th grade?” She smiled at him. 

“Fuck no, I’m not a whore Mandy. It was only like a handful, and they weren’t even anything really.” He sighed. 

“Well still counts in my book.” 

“Yea well you’ve slept with most of the school by this point, boys and girls, so compared to you, I’m a virgin.” She pushed him a little and they both laughed. Ian made his way back to them and smiled at the sight. Mickey heart pounded in his chest just looking at him. He really liked the way his eyes tightened and the way the ends of his lips went up. He could stare at his face all night happily. He would blame his thoughts on the alcohol but really he hadn’t even had a full beer. He realized he was staring too long and looked down at his phone. It was still early but he really didn’t want to stick around. 

“Hey, you guys wanna get out of here? I don’t know maybe go smoke or something. It’s getting a little stuffy in here.” Mickey suggests. 

“Mick, stuffy is usually how most parties are, ya know everyone having fun and all. Wait did you say smoke? So you’re finally gonna share with your lil sis huh?” She was now grinning from ear to ear. 

“Feeling fucking claustrophobic here, so happy birthday. I’ll even share with Raggedy Ann over here if it gets us the fuck out of here quicker.” Mickey dismisses her cheerful tone. 

“Whaddya say Ian, you down to sin a little?” She asked Ian with a short of flirtatious smirk. 

“With you? Any time. Also thought we’ve already been doing that?” He asks pointedly. “Well, you know mainly you. Ever heard of leaving space for Jesus?” He teases. 

Mickey chuckles at that one and Mandy gives him a quick knowing look and shuts him down. 

“Fuck, let’s get out of here already yeah?” Mickey asks. “Fuckin bored of this.” 

“Yea, yea you big baby let’s go.” Mandy says leading the way and pushes ahead of Mickey and Ian. They struggle to catch up as they pass through the crowds. Mickey feels a pressure on his shoulder at some point as they make their way through the house but doesn’t think much of it. Mandy’s standing at the door waiting for them as they get out of the sea of bodies. Mickey looks over his shoulder seeing that the pressure he had felt was Ian’s big freckled hand holding onto him, suddenly very aware of the heat coming off of him. He thinks he could get away with pulling his hand off him, to feel him more. Though he thinks better of it and just shrugs the hand off, the cold creeping back up his shoulder. 

“Jesus Mands, you couldn’t slow down a bit? Had me and Mickey over here ramming through everyone.” He then looks towards Mickey, “Hell even he was rushing through, had to hold on so I wouldn’t get sucked into the pool of hormones…” which solicited a laugh from Mandy. “Damn Milkoviches.” He said grinning hard at Mandy. She opens the door gesturing for them to go ahead of her this time. The boys make it out and wait for her at the curb. She runs down to them and loops an arm through Ian’s as they begin to walk. Mickey ignores the jealousy fuming through his body and makes good on his promise, taking out the joint he had in his sweater. He lights it and takes a drag, looking ahead at the road as they walk towards their homes. He goes to drag another puff out of the joint before it’s pulled from his hands. He looks over offended, then immediately shocked as it wasn’t Mandy who pulled it from his grasp. He watched as the tall ginger fuck took a drag and handed it over to her. Presumptuous motherfucker, he tries to find any fire in him to launch a tirade of insults or anything but staring at him he can’t seem to quell the smile creeping up on his face as Ian releases the smoke smiling towards Mickey.

“Surprised you didn’t bite his finger off over here Mick,” pulling him from his thoughts bringing a frown to his face. “You’re usually more feral about your weed.” she said pointedly.

“Hey, I mean I said I would share didn’t I? ‘Sides I was thinking of where the best places were to hide his body.” his attention now on Ian, eyeing him up. “Gotta be a big space for this ginger asshole.” he muttered, getting a laugh from both his companions. He snatches back the joint and continues onto their stroll through the south side. 

Mickey doesn’t realize they’re getting closer to the Gallagher house until they round the corner and see it in the distance. Their walk back had been peaceful enough, just talking and joking around. 

He really enjoyed Ian’s company, hell he even enjoyed being around Mandy right now. Either because the weed has kicked into full effect or because the energy radiating from Ian has jump started him, feeling ten times better than any high. Yea, he assumed it was the latter. Though now he was beginning to feel a ping in his heart as every step brought them closer and closer to their destination. He didn’t know what attraction felt like and if this was it he was screwed.

“Hey Ian, you think I can use the bathroom when we get there? We still gotta walk home and all.” She asked looking up at him unenthusiastically. 

“Of course, we just gotta be quiet cause they’re probably all asleep.” He answered, and quickly at that. 

They made it up the steps and walked in, Mickey thought he should probably just stay outside. He looked out to the street and and checked his pockets for his cigarettes. He opened the box to find it empty, that fucking sucks. The wood creaks behind him and he turns around in an instant, ready for anything. 

“Jesus, it’s just me Mickey!” Ian had to practically stop himself from shouting. 

“Well when you sneak up on someone, it's not likely to go well for you. Especially with someone like me, just a heads up.” 

“Well I was gonna tell you, you can come inside if you’d like to. It’s fucking cold and Mandy is doing a lot more than pissing rn.” He says gesturing for Mickey to head inside. “Gonna need to clean that up better in the morning.” He groaned to mostly himself. 

Mickey steppes inside and took a seat on the couch, choosing to sit on the closest cushion to the door. Ian closes the door and makes his way in sitting on the opposite side of Mickey. The silence is deafening, say for every other couple of mins that Mandy isn’t heaving in the bathroom.

Ian goes to help her every now and then and settles back into the couch when he comes back. Though Mickey can’t tell whether or not he’s getting closer to him. He feels he should say something, make this interaction as less awkward as he can. He could ask about how Mandy’s doing, that’s neutral enough. 

“S-“

“Uh well-“ 

They smile at each other, and laugh a little.

“You go ahead.” Mickey says, trying to look anywhere but his eyes. 

“I was just gonna say if you think you guys wanna crash here tonight? Mandy rarely gets this fucked up when we go out so when she does, she just sleeps here on the couch. Both of you guys won’t fit here so I can move this table out of the way and bring a couple blankets if you’d like too.” Mickey stares at him for awhile, making Ian feel awkward. “Or maybe you could just walk her home and make sure she doesn’t fall over herself…” Ian just looks down at his hands and Mickey could swear he could see him begin to blush. 

“Think we should probably just head home?” Phrasing more as a question than he would’ve liked. “I’ve dealt with Mandy before, I could get us home.” He looked over behind Ian as Mandy emerged. 

“Noooooo” she groaned, “Mick, come on, the hell we need to get home for? It’s not like you got anything to do, and I feel dead right now.” She sat between them, making Ian scoot over. 

So he had been right, Ian had been inching closer to him. He could think about the connotations of that later. 

“C'mon HES offering it’s not like we’re just intruding, right Ian?” She looks over and he nods viciously. 

“Yea Mick, it’s not a big deal I can move everything around for you guys.” Ian says getting up to get blankets from the downstairs closet. 

“And when your sister wakes up and finds us down here?” Mickey questions.

“She won’t care, she loves Mandy and you’re related to her so she can’t hate you.” Ian hands one of the smaller blankets to Mandy and then hold out another one for Mickey. He hesitates for a moment and then takes it. “Besides if you’re really that concerned about my sister, I can just sleep down here with you guys.” 

Mickey short circuits in that moment.

_ Sleeping? Near Ian?  _ He felt a mixture of both excitement and guilt, with a hint of nervousness. 

“Uhhmm well I uhh-“ Mickey stutters

“You and Mandy can sleep on the floor and I’ll take the couch.” He says smirking at Mandy. 

“What?!” She yells as best she can in a silent whisper, “I am not sleeping on the floor, I need to have proper support for the headache and the oncoming hangover!” 

“Okay, okay Jesus, I’ll just sleep on the floor with Mickey then.” He states plainly. 

_ Fuck, now he’s sleeping right next to Ian???  _ If his heart wasn’t already pounding in his chest, the thought of being that close to Ian was causing his heart to burst.

“Hey Mickey, wanna help me move this over?” He gestures towards the table. Mickey is still looking for his words but decides to go with a nod instead. 

They get the table out of the way and Mickey watches as Ian and Mandy set up blankets and pillows on both the floor and couch. 

“Thanks for the help Mick, really appreciate it.” Mandy says over her shoulder as she puts down yet another blanket. 

“Bite me. ‘Sides if it wasn’t for you we could be home in bed right now. Would’ve been way more comfortable than this mess.” He grumbles and makes his way to the floor. Ian turns off the lights and they all get into their positions. Mickey sitting on the closest side to Mandy, which he decides is a mistake when Mandy leans over and boops him on his nose. He smacks her hand away and she giggles to herself, settling back into the couch. 

Ian’s the last to lay down and Mickey’s heart begins to race again. The space between them is no less than four inches and yet it feels so far away. He keeps his head up towards the ceiling looking through his peripheral at Ian’s laying form. From what he can tell Ian’s on his side looking away from him. 

He chances a glance over and finds the back of Ian’s head. The moonlight coming in from the window making Ian’s hair glow more than it already does. He wants so badly to reach over and run his hands through it. He feels his throat get tight and he scoots every so slightly closer to Ian. His hands palms down on either side of him under their blanket. He sees Ian begin to shift and immediately moves his head towards the ceiling, closing his eyes and feigning sleep. He feels the heat of Ian’s hand near his own. He could almost swear it’s getting close to his own. 

He swallows hard and hopes it doesn’t give him away. He tries to sneakily open one eye and see what Ian was doing. He could tell that Ian was also looking straight up but his eyes were still open. Against his better judgement, he moved his hand again, slowly and carefully towards Ian’s. Ian seems to notice as he looks down to the space where the hands would be if they weren’t covered. Ian’s hand moves and now they’re touching, every so slightly. Mickey can hear his heart in his ears and can’t help the feeling creeping up inside. Trying to keep his breathing even he exhales a little bit more deeper than he wanted to. 

_ Fuck fuck fuck fuck.  _

The heat feels so good, he wants more. Maybe that’s not what Ian wants though, hell as far as he knew, Ian was straight. He had a girlfriend at some point. The thought made him feel both jealous and creepy. If the guy was straight he’d make a fool of himself. Either way, Terry was still in the picture and that wouldn’t bode well for anyone. That was all it took for him to go cold turkey. He moved to his side facing towards Mandy and away from his problem. He opened his eyes and just stared at the couch, the green fibers all coming undone at the seams. He hears Ian shift too and has to fight himself to not turn around. He hears his breathing behind him, chills going up his spine. He closes his eyes enjoying the sound of it. 

He waited for what seemed like hours until Ian’s breathe seemed just as heavy as Mandy’s. He turned to find Ian laying on his side, only this time he was facing Mickey. His features relaxed, mouth only slightly open. Mickey smiled to himself at the view. He was memorizing every single freckle once again and looking down at his parted lips. He  _ wanted  _ Ian. It was plain and simple. He could test the waters, maybe turn back around and lean into him a little. 

_ No.  _ He thought.  _ That’s stupid, this ain’t a damn rom com.  _ He reprimanded himself. He sighed and turned to face upwards again, this was as far as he’d ever let it go. 

He closed his eyes once more, the sleepiness finally creeping up on him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any thoughts? Wanna tell me how bad I am? Comment and let me know. There were a lot of ways I wanted to go with this chapter and well this is the final product. Sorry it’s a bit all over the place but I’m still trying to set up for my future plans with this...
> 
> мій гарний хлопчик - my beautiful/handsome boy


	3. Has It Hit You?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightmares, pancakes and surprises.

He woke up to Ian holding him, the heat pressed against his back and wrapped around his waist engulfed him. He leaned into it not thinking much of it. That was until he realized what was happening. His breathing began to get louder and he looked down to the hand holding him. Pale and full of freckles? Check. Damn, that only meant one thing. He looked behind him and saw the boy holding him. Still sleeping, hair in a mess.

_They didn’t?_ _No they couldn’t have. They didn’t even have time for anything. Hell, Mandy was right next to them._ He glanced but found the couch empty. Now that he thinks about it, everything’s empty. He looked towards where the kitchen should be but saw pitch black nothingness. He looked over again to Ian and found him still sleeping and holding on. He heard the front door slam but couldn’t see anything from his position on the ground. 

“What the fuck is all this?!” An angry familiar voice yelled. He looked up to find none other than Terry Milkovich standing above him. He chanced a look at Ian who was still sleeping peacefully, almost as if Terry wasn’t there at all. 

“It’s not what I-“ Mickey’s cut off by the sound of a cocking gun. 

“It’s not what Mickey? Huh? You being a faggot? A goddamn queer? No Milkovich is gonna take it up the ass. Especially not my own son.” He pointed his gun downwards towards Mickey. He closed his eyes waiting for the bullet to come. Though it never did. He opened his eyes to Terry now pointing the gun at Ian. 

“What’re you?!” Mickey lost his words as he saw Terry’s finger begin to bend. 

***

“KIDS BREAKFAST NOW!” 

Mickey was startled awake, sitting up and gasping for air. The morning light pouring through the window. He looked down to his side and found himself alone. He then looked towards the couch to find Mandy still sleeping soundly. He took in the house, making sure this wasn’t just another one of his fucked up dreams. He saw the youngest Gallagher make their way down the stairs and into the kitchen. He got up and decided to try to wake Mandy. 

“Hey, c’mon get up.” He said, nudging her a little bit. He really didn’t want to deal with the Gallagher bunch alone.

“In my experience, Mandy’s a really heavy sleeper.” 

Mickey jumped, then looked over to the voice.

“I wake up the whole neighborhood getting these kids up and she doesn’t seem to hear a thing.” Fiona says smiling at him from her place in the doorway. 

“Jesus you scared the shit out of me! What’s up with you Gallaghers and creeping up on people?” He groaned, his heart settling down. 

“Don’t know.” She shrugged. “Just right time, right place? Besides, it's pretty easy if just speaking is what startles you.” She said gesturing with her head for him to follow. He walked behind her into the kitchen. “Sit, anywhere you want.” He took a seat next to the little redheaded girl. She kept her focus on her eggs and acknowledged him with a head nod. Fiona came around and set down a plate for him. Pancakes, eggs, and bacon. 

He frowned. “Fiona, you don’t have to d-“ 

“Alright stop right there.” She cut him off. “You don’t really know us but we know a lot about you okay? Mandy’s family to us, ergo you’re family too.” She smiled and walked back into the kitchen. 

“Uh well thank you.” He looked down to his plate and dug in. 

_ Ah banana pancakes, that’s the stuff. _ He didn’t like making himself another person's problem, but hey if it gets him banana pancakes what’s the harm in it? He would fill his mouth with bacon and eggs then choke it down, then do the same with the pancakes. The little boy in front of him watched and began trying to stuff his face too. They both stared at each other and then proceeded to eat a little bit faster. Though Mickey did bite off more than he could chew leaving him pounding at his chest for a second. He swallowed down the food and went to drink his water. Fiona had offered him coffee but after his nightmare last night he’s sure he’s had enough adrenaline for the day. He looked over at the boy in front of him with a small smile playing at his lips. Honestly he was impressed, he can usually stuff his face more than anyone he knows. Well that being a short list comprising Mandy and Iggy but still, they were worthy competitors. “Jesus kid, the fuck are you, a damn vacuum?”

“No, I’m Carl.” Clearly the kid wasn’t the sharpest shiv in the utensil holder. Speaking of. 

“The hell is this?” He pulled out a pointy object out of the cup in the center of the table. It looked to have once been a toothbrush but now wrapped up in duct tape and sharpened on the bottom end of it. 

“It’s a shiv, duh? Ian made it for Debbie when kids were bullying her at school.” Carl shrugged.

“Oh yea! I forgot about it.” Debbie said, grabbing it out of Mickey’s hands. She pressed the pointed end on her index finger and frowned. “It’s not as sharp as it used to be though.” 

“Yea well when you use it a lot it gets dull. Wait have you used it a lot?” Mickey asked, now becoming impressed with the little redhead next to him. 

“Well only like twice… for self defense of course! It’s been a hard freshman year okay!” She said defensively. 

“Hey I ain’t one to judge.” He held up his hands in surrender. When he saw her shoulders lose their tension he stuck out his fist to her. “Bullies are the scum of the Earth. You gotta show ‘em they can’t be messin’ with you.” She gave him a fist bump and they continued to eat their breakfast. The Gallagher’s weren’t half bad, he might actually like them. That is until Lip came down the stairs. He had known about him since he had been one of the very few to make it out of the Southside even managing to get himself into a pretty decent college. Though from what he’s heard of the guy, not the best person to hang around. 

“Yo!” Lip said to the group eating. “Thanks.” He said as he grabbed a plate and sat right next to Mickey. Now he was beginning to feel claustrophobic, there were like three other seats around the table. He could’ve sat himself down anywhere but no, here they were. “So Milkovich, back again huh? Careful, someone might get the wrong impression.” Lip directed at him. 

“Yea well it’s not by choice.” Mickey muttered. Lip didn’t say anything more and he’s glad it ended just as quick as it started.

He was barely finishing up when Mandy made her way out of the living room. “Hey, good morning, thank you.” She said as she was handed a plate by Fiona and made her way to the table. She nudged Lip’s shoulder and he got up and sat at the other end of Debbie. Mandy sat down with Mickey and gave him a quick little smile. He only had an egg and half a pancake left after his… whatever the fuck it was that happened with Carl, but he could take his time. He really didn’t want to sit there not eating and waiting for his sister. “Thank you Mick.”

“What for? I didn’t make the food. Tell her.” He said pointing towards Fiona. 

“I already did. I just meant for not dragging me out to brave the Chicago winter last night.” 

“You know we’re in summer now right?” 

“Well yeah, but it usually doesn’t get really hot until the end of June.” She countered pointing her fork at him. 

“Sure I guess.” He looked around feeling awkward just talking, he felt as though everyone was listening. Though now as he looked around everyone was wrapped up in their own conversations. He was beginning to like the way the family just seemed to work. There was no censorship and from what he could tell, no real judgement. He wasn’t above eavesdropping and hearing about Fiona’s new boyfriend for the week and the family’s support for her was honestly refreshing. 

You would never find anything like this in the Milkovich household. No one ever talked about the little things like relationships or feelings or whatever. He barely talked to Mandy about anything and she was most definitely the person he was closest to. She didn’t know about any of the things burning him up inside. He stares at her eating, in thought. Could he trust her? What if she’s just like Terry? He doesn’t really know whether or not she’s all for the whole getting a dick up your ass thing. What would he even gain from telling her about his little existential crisis? It’s not like her knowing would get him to open up anymore than he already did to himself. 

* _ flick* _

“Ow, fuck you do that for?” He rubbed his forehead. It didn’t actually hurt but Mickey was into the theatrics of it all. 

“Quit staring, thought you were planning my goddamn murder.” She looked annoyed but Mickey could tell she was also exaggerating. 

“Believe me, you’re not worth spending time in the clink for.” He said, eating his last piece of egg and getting up from his seat. He walked over to the sink where Fiona was already washing the dishes. 

“You can just give ‘em to me.” She said smiling at him, and reaching for his plate. He couldn’t understand how these people just kept being so happy. He knew they weren’t exactly “happy” happy, when you live in the Southside you don’t get that luxury. Though they were more peppier than most people he saw living their lives. He walked back over to the table but decided to just sit on a stool instead of taking up space at the table. He was just starting to think again about whether or not Mandy would be a good candidate to test out the whole coming out speech on, when the man of his nightmares walked in. Well not the neo-nazi but the more attractive version of a Chucky doll. Everyone greeted him and he smiled back at them. Though his stomach sank as he began to think back to what had happened in his dream. The pit in his stomach becoming more of a problem. Is this what anxiety is? Can you even get PTSD from a dream? He’d have to google that later. 

He regathered himself quickly and watched as the ginger shrugged out of his sweatshirt. He did not miss how his shirt pulled up ever so slightly as he pulled it over his head. Ian was sweating and his cheeks were flushed, his shirt soaked around the collar and through the middle. 

“How was your run?” Mandy asked barely acknowledging the boy behind him to finish her food. 

“It was good! Only 3 miles today but eh I’ve done worse.” The redhead said, putting his hand on her shoulder. “Oh look! There was this really nice spot where you could see the sun rise.” He pulled out his phone and began showing Mandy the pictures. She nodded her approval and even gasped at one of the pictures.

“It’s so fuckin’ pretty! You need to take me there Ian.” She practically exuded excitement. 

“Yea, I would but you know when you go to sleep you die! I have yet to find anything that will wake you up in the wee hours of the morning.” He said grinning at her. Mickey laughed a little at that, he knew exactly how his sister got. She pushed Ian a little and then looked over to Mickey. 

“What’re you laughing at you’re worse than me! You barely get up before 5 in the afternoon on the weekends.” She huffed. 

“Well that’s what the weekends are for dumbass.” He laughed as she shot daggers at him.

“Well he’s got a point there.” Lip adds. 

“No one asked you  _ Philip _ .” Mandy barked back, making Lip raise his hands in surrender. 

“Anyways, I’m gonna head for a shower.” Ian announced, going up the stairs. 

“Hey! Your food is gonna be in the microwave, okay? Me and Debbie are leaving in a little bit.” Fiona called out to him. They heard what sounded like an okay and continued on with their conversations. 

Mickey heart was finally slowing down to its normal beat and he already missed the presence of the ginger fuck. He thought up ways to weasel himself up to the top floor. Just to see him again, but he thought asking to go to the bathroom as Ian had just announced he was showering was a little bit on the nose. Besides, the first floor bathroom was empty so he would probably get directed that way anyways. Maybe it was for the best, you know what they say. Too much of a good thing can be fucking annoying.

He sighs to himself and gets up from his seat. Excusing himself and saying thanks before walking into the living room. He was ready to go and start his day. Being in the Gallagher home was not exactly how he planned to spend his Saturday after all. Not like he had plans but they definitely would not be here.

He was just getting on his second shoe when Mandy sat down next to him.

“Where are you heading to?”

“None of your business.” He mumbled, tying his shoe. 

“Well, I was gonna ask you if maybe you wanted to stay here with me and Ian to take care of the kids.” She said, there was something in her face but Mickey couldn’t quite make it out. 

“Why would I wanna play house with you two homos?” 

“Fine never mind, I was just asking Mick.” She looked a little bit disappointed but Mickey would stand his ground for now. She got up to head back into the kitchen when Mickey grabbed her hand. He had a soft spot for his sister, sue him. 

“Look, I gotta actually do stuff okay? But when I’m done I’ll come. Stop being such a…” He couldn't find the proper word for it. 

“ A Milkovich?” She offered. “We do always get what we want, don’t we?” She smiled at him and kissed his cheek then ran off. His sister deserved the world and if she wanted him here, he would be. That didn’t stop him from flipping her off or calling her a bitch though. He walked out the door, ready to go earn his cash for the week. He put one foot in front of the other and as he began his descent forward he realized he hadn’t tied his shoes earlier. 

_ “Fuck!” _ He tumbled over a little bit and felt a sharp pain in his right eyebrow, lower lip, and cheek. He picked himself up and sat down on the lowest step. Of fucking course this shit happens to him. He put his finger to his eyebrow, wincing at the pain. 

_On the bright side, maybe I’ll get one of those cool scars._ _On the bright side…_ He did think that phrase was stupid but still. He double knotted both his laces and cleaned off some of his blood with the inside of his jacket. He could wash it off later. 

He began his walk to the Kash n Grab, it was his usual place of getting money the Milkovich way. Kash feared him and for good reason, Mickey was a force to be reckoned with and everyone in the Southside knew it. 

This was his only source of income sadly, no one wanted to hire him so he resorted to the family “business”. He didn’t enjoy it much but people like Kash deserved it, besides the word was that he was a big ol perv. So he was doing the world a favor. 

He sighed as he turned the corner to the store. What threat would he use today? Car battery and jumper cables? Nah, he used that last week. Maybe give him a closer look at his knuckle tattoos? That would do the trick. He pushed the door open and was delighted with the frightened look already on Kash’s face. 

“You know the deal, cmon I don’t got all day.” Kash was quick to the register and began to bring out the bills. Mickey went around the little store looking for his main prize in this shithole. Lo and behold, in the snack aisle as always the Snickers bar presented itself to him. He grabbed a handful and made his way to the cash register. Kash was finishing up with the money and Mickey saw the display of Slim Jims and decided to broaden his horizons with some savory snacks for a change. He grabs a handful of the Slim Jims and puts down both piles on the counter. 

“That’s new.” Kash mumbled under his breath. 

“What’s that? Huh? Got something to say, speak up.” Mickey said, growing a little bit angry. 

“Nothing nothing.” Kash said putting the snickers and slim jims into the bag with the money. “Gonna take anything else?” Mickey ignored him heading for the door when he heard Kash mutter “Fucking kid.” And well let’s just say Mickey has beat others for less. So he put his bag on the door handle, turned around, and formally introduced Kash to  _ FUCK _ and  _ U-UP _ . After giving him a good pummeling he got up from the floor and warned Kash to watch himself. He grabbed his bag of money and chips and walked out of the store. 

He looked down at his knuckles and the bruises building up on them. Though he didn’t enjoy dishing out beatings he couldn’t help but notice the beauty of the purplish red marks on his pale skin. It truly was like an art, the way the bruises swirled and formed and would fade away. He’s had many experiences with bruises in the past, especially with the way he grew up. Yet, everytime he got a bruise he didn’t try to hide it. He examined it, the breaking of the small capillaries under the skin. He chose to look on the bright side and see how something so painful can also be so beautiful. He had thought that the shade of red playing on knuckles was his favorite. Though now when the thought of red comes in his head it isn’t bruises. It’s that fiery red hair on a particular lanky kid. He smiled to himself and thought about it for a little while more. 

He grabbed a snickers bar from the bag and began devouring it. He was sure nothing could top the sweet sweet flavor of chocolate, peanuts, and caramel. When finishing the candy bar, he licked off all the chocolate on his fingers that had melted off in the Chicago sun. He liked the warmth on his skin, it made him feel at peace for some reason. He walked to his house so he could drop off his earnings for the day. He would’ve gone straight to the Gallagher’s home but his was closer. Besides walking out with about $300 in a plastic bag is a really good way to get robbed, so the faster the better. 

Rounding the street of his house he noticed two cop cars parked in front of it. 

_ They couldn’t be after me right? It’s been what, a couple minutes? _ He got behind a truck parked a little further down the street. He was watching his house, ready for anything to happen.

Well everything other than a hand on his shoulder. He jumped and turned around to see Iggy laughing while holding up his hands in surrender. He had half a mind to beat Iggy for scaring him like that. Though that could wait. 

“The fucks going on in there?” Mickey asked. 

“Dunno, I went to get breakfast with a friend and when I came back there were cops outside and, like you, decided it’s probably best not to intervene.” Iggy looked over at the house from their position behind the pick-up. “Terry probably fucked up his parole again.” 

“Let’s hope, that bastard has been out for too long already.” 

“Mick, it’s been like 4 days since he got out.” Iggy laughed. 

“Exactly, four days too many.” Iggy nodded to that and they continued to watch the house. It wasn’t until another 20 minutes later that they saw Terry being dragged out of the house along with one of their uncles. 

“Damn looks like they got Uncle Jack too, huh? Two for one.” Iggy said nodding to himself. 

“We should count ourselves lucky. How long you thinkin’ this time? My bets on 7 months at most.” Mickey said as he watched both his piece of shit father and no good uncle get out into separate cars. 

“Hmmm, well we don’t know what they did, but since Jack was involved it’s probably more than just drugs. I’m going with two years minimum.” Iggy said making Mickey feel just a little hopeful. 

“You really think so? Shit, what would he have to do that would get him two years?” Mickey questioned. 

“Well with Uncle Jack what’s the usual things they get into? Robbery or murder. And well if they were caught for either of those, and we know that if it’s robbery they went big like a bank or something, that’s pretty much more than a years worth in the clink. He’s also a violent offender so that’ll probably do more harm than good for him. There’s a chance we might be asked to testify against him too and if we play our cards right we can make sure he gets the life sentence.” Mickey looked up at him wordless, thinking over everything Iggy had just said. 

When he finally found his words he frowned. “First of all, how the hell do you know we’ll even be asked to testify? You want us to rat out Terry? The man who has connections everywhere and can have us wacked at any point? You really think that’s a good idea? You’d get all of us killed. The hell you even get this whole idea from? Our story doesn’t have a happy ending, just small interludes to disappointment.” Mickey's face was red, the anger stirring inside him. It wasn’t directed at Iggy, it was all stemming from his hate for Terry. He had his kids fucked for life with no way out and it wasn’t fair. Though nothing in life is fair, he’d learned that much in his 18 years of life. 

“Alright fine, just forget it then.” Iggy conceded. Honestly Mickey was waiting for Iggy to fight him on this, give him hope and reasons why it would work. He wanted to be free of Terry, he didn’t want to be under his rule anymore, though he would never be that lucky. 

“Good, fuck cmon I gotta drop shit off then head to the Gallagher’s house.” Mickey started walking towards the house, the cops barely off the street. 

“Gallagher’s? What Frank owe us money or some shit?” Iggy questioned. 

“Nah shithead, Mandy’s over there and she wanted me to stay with her and her ginger friend. I had business to attend to though so I told her I’d be back afterwards.” He said gesturing to the bag in his hand. 

“Ginger?” Iggy thought it over. “Oh! That redhead fuck who she’s always with. Hmmm, Ed? No uh, fuck what’s the kids name?” 

“Ian.” Mickey said pushing open the door. The house was a mess, papers and bags and garbage littered the floor. There were shards of glass in one corner, which had come about from a framed picture of the Milkovich siblings with their mother. He put down his bag on the coffee table and leaned down towards the glass. He picked up the picture, shaking off the remnants of glass. He saw all the smiling faces, hell they couldn’t have been more than nine years old. Colin was probably thirteen around that time, the weight of having to help Terry evident in his face. He looked at Mandy, her face all round and her smile brighter than the sun could ever hope to be. Iggy's eyes were closed but his smile was still playing on his face. Then there was Mickey and his mother. Mickey was in the middle underneath his mother smiling up at her, not even bothering to look at the camera. Laura was smiling so hard her eyes were squinched up. He loved seeing his mother like that. Happy. He folded it up and put it in his pocket. 

“Dad really trashed the place huh?” Iggy commented walking around the living room and picking up a couple of beer cans and papers. He put them on the coffee table and began to clean the couch. Mickey looked over at him and decided maybe two pairs of hands were better than one. They cleaned up all of Terry’s mess and managed to make their home somewhat presentable. It’s not like they planned on inviting over anyone but Mandy would end up cleaning and they didn’t want to leave their baby sister to clean. 

Iggy took a look inside the bag and whistled drawing Mickey’s attention. “What’s all this from?” Mickey was already grabbing the bag of money out of his hand before he could even finish his sentence. 

“It’s my work pay. How’s bout you go actually do something instead of trying to take my shit huh?” He squeezed the end and walked to his room. 

“I wasn’t gonna take it Mick, Jesus. I was just impressed is all.” Mickey scoffed and closed his door. Iggy was a lot of things but a liar he was not, so he knew he could trust that his money would still be around when he got back. Though if anyone else came digging around he can’t really vouch for them now could he? He lifted up one of the floorboards and hid the money down there next to his backpack full of weed, courtesy of a kid at school he beat to submission. Underneath the backpack though were his porno mags, he tried to keep them out of reach of his brothers and Mandy. They weren’t gay magazines but still some might question why the guys are the only ones who’s part of the page is a bit wrinkly.

He hid his money, taking about $50 with him. Maybe he’d treat himself and his companions to some ‘za. 

_ Who the hell even says ‘za?  _ He thought to himself. He decided he should take a shower and change his clothes, he probably smelled from how sweaty he got this morning. He stripped down to boxers and then made his way into the restroom. He looked himself over in the mirror and patted his stomach, some might describe him as a couple cheeseburgers away from fat. He grinned a little to himself and walked into the shower. 

When he got out he began to contemplate what he wanted to wear. He could dress up if he needed to, though dressing up for him would be black jeans and his black leather jacket. He liked the color black, and what of it?

He decided against the all black attire for now and got on a yellow-orange tie-dye shirt Mandy had bought for him at some point, dark blue jeans and the leather jacket. It was a classic and besides he looked really good in it. He messed with his wet hair a little bit and then decided it was good enough. He’s not gonna lie, he kinda felt excited to see Ian again. He wanted to be friends with him, and if Terry was going to be going away for a bit now would be the perfect time. It seems for once the stars aligned for him. 

He got his wallet and his phone and began to head out the door fliping off Iggy as he catcalled him. Hitting the pavement, he moved with a spring in his step. Which was quickly halted as he began to realize how different he was feeling. In the span of around 24 hours he was now more sure of his sexuality than he had every been. It was terrifying. His stomach turned thinking about the prospect of being gay. What the hell did that even really mean? He liked dudes, so what? He wasn’t waving around pride flags, he wasn’t in make up, he didn’t want to wear skirts or any of that “gay shit”, was that offensive to him now? He was just him, Mickey Milkovich, a well known badass who’d sooner move to Canada than come out. Yet he couldn’t stop the warmth in his chest at the thought of Ian, what the hell even was this feeling? 

He shook his head and kept trudging forward. It was already around 3, the sun was still shining and Mickey loved the feel of it. He spent way more time cleaning up Terry’s problem than he had planned to today. He was looking forward to just watching movies and eating pizza. He sped up a little bit, trying to convince himself it was for the pizza and not for the person he would see when he got there. 

He knocked twice upon arriving, though no one answered. Then he knocked again, and again, and again. Until finally he tried for the door handle which unsurprisingly was open. That was usually a sure fire way to get robbed but he doubted people in this neighborhood would attempt to steal from the Gallagher’s. They were popular among the community and there was always a Gallagher home so it wouldn’t be easy to just take their shit. 

He walked in to find that Mandy Ian and a boy, Carl if he remembered correctly, watching some shitty food network show. He put his hand on the back of the couch causing Mandy to look up at him. 

“So you actually came?”

“I’m here aren’t I? Didn’t you hear me banging on the damn door, fuck?” Mickey complained as he walked around the couch to sit next to her. Ian was looking at him too now and he was starting to feel hot under his gaze.

“Well everyone usually just walks in, the doors always open, literally. So when you kept knocking we thought it was like the cops or something.” Ian answered flashing an apologetic smile at him. 

“Yea well, clearly I ain’t the Feds. You got any food in this shithole?” 

“Uhhh…” Ian thought for a second. “Well I mean there’s like probably some left over something in the fridge but I don’t know.”

“Then it’s settled we’re ordering pizza.” Mickey declared. 

“With what money Mick?” Mandy asked. “We’re all poor around here.” 

“On the contrary Mands,” he pulled out the $50 and smirked “I got paid today.” 

  
  
  


“Only a fifty Mick?” Mandy questioned.

“You work?” Ian said, looking a tad bit surprised.

Before Mickey could answer though Mandy interrupted. “Of course he doesn’t work, he’s a Milkovich. Who did you rob this time? Was it the people at the laundromat? No, it was Kash again huh?” She asked pointedly. 

”Jesus it doesn’t matter how I got the money, you want some food or not? I’m just trying to be nice.” He scowled. 

“I’d really appreciate some blood money pizza.” Ian chimed, causing Mickey to smile. 

“See? We’re all hungry and we got money for food so quit your yapping.” He said as he pulled out his phone to dial the pizza place. Mandy sighed in agreement and began to talk to Ian about something, Mickey was busy with his phone call. He ordered two large meat lovers pizza and an order of wings. He had money so he was really too worried about the cost. 

***

The pizza came and they ate and they had a good time. Mickey and Ian were seemingly becoming closer and could hold conversations together. 

Mandy was relieved that two of the most important people in her life seemed to get along. She had wanted to introduce them to each other before but she never really knew when she could. Though this little encounter they were having was possibly the best way it could’ve gone down. 

Mickey and Ian were talking video games and bands while Mandy just sat back and watched the bromance happen. She was glad her brother had finally made at least an acquaintance, he’d always been a loner and that made her upset. It was even better that it was Ian since she loved him and knew him already. 

***

They had many days like that afterwards, hanging out at either the Gallagher’s or Milkovich’s and watching movies or just talking. They’d either get drunk, get high, eat some food or a combination of all of them. Mandy couldn’t help but notice how often she was seeing her brothers smile. He was happier these past weeks than she’s ever seen him. Hell, since their mom was still around. Is this what Mickey was like with friends? He’s never had any before so maybe that’s all it took to make her brother happy. He was becoming less rough around the edges and she was glad to see that happening.

Though, she has a sneaking suspicion it was something else when she would catch Mickey just staring at Ian, like he was entranced. She kept her thoughts to herself though in case she was wrong, though she had a pretty good gaydar. She only had to look at Ian once to realize they were batting for the same team. Her brother was a little bit harder to figure out though. She’d known him her whole life, but he’d never given any sort of sign of being into dudes. Which honestly was a good thing cause if Terry sniffed even the slightest bit of homo on him it wouldn’t have ended well. 

Speaking of Terry the past 3 weeks without him had been a dream. Mandy slept peacefully knowing that Terry was rotting in prison, and she suspected Mickey was too since he’d been looking like he’d finally gotten those 8 hours of sleep. Even Iggy was more full of energy than before. Needless to say the Milkoviches were thriving without their “father” around to fuck up their day. Luckily, it turns out Terry and uncle Jack had robbed a bank, they had also sent a bank teller to the hospital in critical condition. Their trial was still yet to happen though there was talk of Terry getting at least 10 years, maybe 20 if the dude in the hospital croaked.

Mandy had found a job at a Waffle House where she was working for minimum wage. With the help of herself and Ian, she had even gotten Mickey an actual job at Pizza Hut. He always ordered his pizza from there so Mandy thought it would be a good fit for him. When Mandy had first told him that their local one was hiring he blew her off, telling her he didn’t need it. Then she told Ian about it since he’d been wanting to quit the Kash n Grab for a while now. Later in that day, Mickey and him got on talking about how HE found out they were hiring and HE was thinking of applying. Mandy was pretty sure she had her brother figured out after this incident, though she’d wait for him to tell her. 

***

Mickey woke up how he had most mornings recently, with a sticky stain on his underwear. It was as if he had barely hit puberty, he was waking up every morning either with his own cum on himself or morning wood. If it were the latter, he would just get it out of his system and clean himself off. Though now he had to hop in the shower. He didn’t mind, he liked being the first one in, he’d usually get all the hot water. 

He stripped himself and threw his dirty underwear in his bucket. He got in the shower turning the water on too hot. He liked the feel of heat against his skin, reddening him. He turned around to let the water massage his neck, instantly feeling his muscles relax.

He thought back on the past two weeks fondly. He and Ian were friends now, that thought alone made his heart skip a beat. They weren’t best friends by any means, they didn’t sleep over each other’s houses or gossip or do any of that normal friend shit. They hung out and did miscellaneous things like watch movies and smoke and eat. 

It didn’t matter what they were doing though, just being around Ian made him happy. It hadn’t hit him yet just how fucked he already was. 

He enjoyed hanging out with Ian and Mandy, they were like the three musketeers. Though Ian and Mandy usually planned things without him like going to an actual movie theatre to watch movies or even just going to the mall. Mickey wasn’t really into social things like going to the mall but he would’ve liked an invite, jeez. 

Though he was happy how changed his life had become in three weeks. He had finally taken the first few steps in being a homo by watching gay porn, which was way better than the other shit he would watch. He wasn’t bold enough to get gay magazines but the internet was a wonderful place. 

He was still iffy on his feelings for the redhead but he wasn’t as against it anymore. They worked together now and being in a relationship with a coworker probably wouldn’t be the best idea ever. Though playing around with Ian and throwing flour on each other could be considered flirting.

At least to Mickey since Ian and his girlfriend seemed to be in a good place from what he would hear from Mandy. It’s such an odd feeling to want your sister to shut the hell up but also tell you everything she knows. He wouldn’t ask directly about the relationship but would just listen more intently when Mandy brought it up. 

At some points he could swear Mandy would bring up Ian’s relationship on purpose for whatever reason. Maybe she was jealous of them, he knows for sure he was. 

In any case, he was really happy with where he was in life. Hell, he never thought he would have a real job or make actual money. It was surprising to him how much not having a bad parent around could help them all grow. 

Everything seemed to be going his way.

*knock knock* “Hey Mick? You got mail.” Iggy said, sliding it through the crack under the door.

_ Mail? _ He thought to himself.  _ It better be my next check. _ He snickered as he reached down to get it.

It was a regular envelope with their address and  _ For Mickey Milkovich  _ handwritten in front of it.

He cut it open with his handy dandy exacto knife and spilled the paper out onto his bed. It was folded in thirds and sealed with a clear tape.

All it read was:

_ Hey you’re probably not gonna like me back but 100% of the shots not taken are missed so I thought I would give it a try. I think you’re really cute _ _and I_ _know you wouldn't feel the same but I just wanted to at least be able to tell you. Even if you don't know who it is. Anyways, I guess I'll see you at work._

Mickey read it over three times before he even really understood it. Someone at work liked him??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow its been almost a year since I updated this I'm sorry, life caught up to me but hey I'm back again!

**Author's Note:**

> So what do you think is gonna happen at the party? I know I haven’t really gotten into anything but I just wanted to build the world a little bit. Please leave comments telling me what to improve on or what you guys would like to see. I’m really hoping this goes somewhere.


End file.
